..... but I kind of am, actually. Too proud to beg, that is, even though what I'm begging for is not for me. So instead of begging, I'm going to run a contest.
Here's the deal. Every autumn for ten years I participated in the New York Avon Walk for Breast Cancer (I know, it should be called the Avon Walk Against Breast Cancer, but I don't get to choose the name). In each of those years, instead of dumping a bucket of ice water over my head (not that there's anything wrong with that!), I walked 39.3 miles over the course of two days to raise awareness about breast cancer and to raise money for prevention, treatment, and research to eventually achieve a cure. To participate, I had to raise a minimum of $1,800 each year.
Last year, I gave myself a sabbatical. This year, I signed up again, but what with my getting all wrapped up with this and that, I totally neglected my fundraising efforts. Result: as of right now, about three weeks before the date when I have to have all my donations in, I've only raised about a third of the money I need to raise. (It's too complicated to get into the details, but although the actual deadline is several weeks later, the Walk weekend gets a LOT harder for me if I haven't gotten all my donations in by September 22nd.)
So. Here is my idea. If you're reading this post, I'm asking you to consider making a donation to help me meet my fundraising goal. All you have to do is go to www.avonwalk.org, look me up on the list of walkers (Susan Brody), and make a tax-deductible online donation. Whoever makes the largest donation between now and Wednesday, September 10th, at 9:00 p.m. Eastern time, will get to choose his or her prize from the following list:
1. I will critique 30 pages of an original, unpublished manuscript. True, I haven't have any of my own books published yet, but honestly: I'm a hell of an editor, if I say so myself.
2. I will write a stupid poem for you, on any subject you choose. I write GREAT stupid poems.
3. I will bake a batch of cookies - any kind you request - and send them to you, wherever you might be. I'm not a bad cookie-baker.
4. I will give you a box of awesome books from my overflowing personal library, trying to match the selections to your preferences.
5. I will be your best friend forever and ever. (Desperate times call for desperate measures.)
If you choose to participate, thank you!! After you've made your donation, please send me an email at muranosb(at)gmail(dot)com, so that I have your contact info in case you're the lucky winner. And if you don't choose to participate, I'm still your friend. Just not your BEST friend. That's fair, right?