MERCURIAL ME

     I haven't posted in 18 days. Why? Because I'm mercurial, that's why. Oh, sure, I'm also old, dull and stodgy, but in a very mercurial way, ya know? And for 18 days, my brain has not connected to this blog. Now, as I sit at home with nothing to do, waiting for a repairman who's "running a little late," I will try to make up for lost time.
     In the past few weeks, I've been to two funerals and one wake, and it's all taken quite a toll on me even though I'd never met two of the people who had died.  It's only been five months since my father-in-law passed away, and it began to feel like an endless downward spiral.
     But life has moved forward around me in other ways.  Notably, my daughter got her driver's license and is now the owner of a 2002 Toyota Corolla:

     (Those are balloons and streamers, by the way.)  She's been driving to school this week and, aside from locking her keys in the car the first day, has suffered no mishaps - at least none that she's told me about.  Sometimes I stop and think: "What have I unleashed on the world?"  But mostly I deal with it almost as if I trust her to act like an adult.
     My son is home for his summer internship in New York and, oh my God, he gets up in the morning, irons his dress shirt, puts on a suit and tie, and departs for the legal department of HBO.  Is that cool, or terrifying?  I haven't decided.
     In a week and a half  I'll be going to the New Jersey SCBWI annual conference, where I will attend workshops, carry out my mega-important volunteer assignments, and meet with agents who will critique the first 15 pages of my book.  They'll like what they've read, and nothing will come of it.  Mark my words. 
     Old, stodgy, mercurial and jaded.  That's me in a nutshell.  Funny, though.  My saving grace.

Where Have I Been?

     It's been two whole weeks since I last posted.  Why?  Hard to say.  Finishing my first draft has left me at loose ends, not quite knowing what to do with myself or what to blog about.  But it's not as if nothing has happened in my little sphere.
     I took my daughter to visit two art schools: Pratt Institute in Brooklyn and the School of Visual Arts in Manhattan.  Both fabulous.  She's applying to a lot of other schools too, but those two visits have been enough to convince me that there will be a place for her when she graduates high school, and she will be happy.
     Last week she took the SAT, and three days ago she took, and passed, her road test.  We're in the process of buying her a 2002 Toyota Corolla.  Her march toward adulthood is quickening its pace.
     My friend Alyssa's niece, who had been missing for a month since disappearing from her home, has now been confirmed dead.  Her body was found last week near the George Washington Bridge.  A lovely, bright, talented girl with everything to look forward to, kidnapped and killed by the demon of depression just before her 22nd birthday.  I don't know what I believe in, but if Paige's soul is anywhere now, I hope it's a place where it can lie down in the sunlight and know peace.
     My friend Sylvia's husband passed away a week ago after a different kind of struggle.  After 70-plus years of robust health, he developed ALS, and lived with it for two years thanks to her ferociously loving and devoted care.  I don't know what she will do now.  She married him at 19 and is now in her 70's.
     Life is beautiful, cruel, fragile, short.  Honor it, make the most of it, and be a shining light to those around you.  And thank the mothers in your life every day, not just the Hallmark day.